reminder: secrets to tell my soulmate

I will tell you why I fucked you before I could kiss you

why i kept you in between walls, delirious and lost

why i stripped away your questions into lips

I will tell you how I’ll always be in love with him:

the first boy to choose me (and me again)

how our eyes have spoken far too much to ever be strangers

how i am yours because of his sacrifice

why I know you’ll always love her as well

I will tell you about my parents

who took too long to figure it out

blood that left a bloody casualty

how I lay trapped in a labyrinth of snakeskin

I will tell you about the hollow welts on my skin

how the lines on my wrists are borders between if and now

why all those happy commercials make me cry

I will tell you why i always listen

sealed lips that break into poetry when you’re not looking

why i can’t believe my space would seem anything but empty to you

I will tell you—quietly, hushed like dawns first sigh—how much i love you

the noisy static in my stomach deflates with a hum of submission

your touch cradles my marrow, gentle fingertips smelling of rose

heart so full & swollen to the point of pain, it’s a humdrum ready to burst,

my past lives are sure, whispering to me again in languages of Lifetimes:

it’s you. it’s you. it has always been you.